Dear community,   I would like to report miracles that are happening.   Last week’s newsletter was all about the “why”. Why do I even bother. Why do I take one day a week and who knows how many hours of rumination to publish a newsletter that not so many people read?   My answer to that question is (and has been for a while now): community. I am actively searching and listening deeply to cues from the field as to how to either find a community where I can be fully myself or c

With love, (a tiny sprinkle of) rage, and reverence, Your disorganized, recovering people-pleaser and community-dreamer, Corina

Dear community.   I have been having this nagging feeling that there are certain relationships in my life where I don’t show up as my most authentic self all the time. Specifically, the relationships that are the closest to me and even more specifically, the pattern shows up when I am tired.  The best way I can describe this non-authentic self is “people pleasing”.   People pleasing is a particular kind of prison  that looks virtuous from the outside: I am defined as  the kin

Dear community, It’s 11:43am and I’m still in bed- not because I’m tired, but because I am still questioning if I should send this newsletter out or keeping it in my draft folder. There’s a specific anxiety that shows up for me ever since I’ve committed to building something of my own. It whispers: Is this valuable? Am I actually helping anyone? And maybe even more uncomfortably: Is this just exhibitionism? I have no idea if this will help anyone else. But I do know for sure

With love, (a tiny sprinkle of) rage, and reverence,   Corina

Dear community,   Here’s a science-based paradigm (Terri O’Fallon) I found out about in these past 7 years of being outside the system, seeking and searching. It’s made a big difference in my life, as I feel like I finally have a map, and don’t feel so lost any longer.   The basic principle is this: Our minds have a teleology.(The word teleology comes from the Greek word telos, which means end, aim, or purpose. So teleology simply means: the idea that something has an inheren

Dear community,   It looks like yesterday's newsletter really hit a nerve, based on all the responses I received, so now you are receiving a bonus newsletter!   Thank you again for reading, thank you for participating and thank you for all the kind words. It makes me happy to see that I am not the only one thinking about these things, and to untangle and bring to the surface the stories that we are immersed in.   Today's story is about gray hair.   In 2020, at the age of fort

Dear community,   First of all, I thoroughly enjoyed your responses to last week's newsletter. Thank you for reading, thank you for participating and thank you for allowing me a glimpse into your inner worlds. I love the invisible threads of connection and learning about new and different points of view.   Last night, I went to a Super Bowl party. A friend brought a genuinely excellent cake. The kind of cake that makes a room go quiet when the box opens.   She cut it into sli

Dear community,   Last week, one of the artists in my co-working group said he didn't have enough money to buy food and he was hungry. I commissioned a work of art from him that I didn't need because I felt very sorry that he was hungry. Then, I started feeling  bad about my choice. I could've donated the money to a worthier cause- there are children suffering of hunger and cold all over the world etc etc.  Or I could have saved the money. I could have invested it in my own c

Dear community,   You know when a truth hits you so hard you almost can't tell if it's a breakdown or a breakthrough?   I had one of those moments today.   I was in a session with Coach Inga (the coach that helps me learn the skills to be in harmonious relationships, without betraying myself) this morning, feeling grumpy, contradictory, on the edge of a temper tantrum. In other words — deeply in my Shadow (I will explain in more detail the concept of Shadow, as first contemp

If I Forgave Myself, I Would Do This If I forgave myself, I would recommit. To what? To this body. This temple of sinew and the home of my soul that I have fed like a glutton and punished like a penitent. I would recommit to food as sacrament. To tracking it, journaling it, blessing it. To putting intention into meals, not punishment or numbness. I would recommit to my environment. That means a full, somatic, spiritual, and architectural cleanse. Basement. Attic. Every drawer

I have just returned from a 5 day detoxification retreat (fasting mimicking diet, sauna and cold plunge). I'm not going to lie- it wasn't the easiest or the most fun I've had in my life. However, I do love a good, safe challenge and this was precisely that. And apparently, the metabolic benefit of such a challenge can last anywhere between 6 to 12 months. This is the reason my newsletter is late this week- because I have just arrived yesterday from Lockhart, TX. Full trip rep

Dear community, My personal consumption and the overall consumption of the human community have been on my mind a lot these days.  I think the reason I think about this all the time is because I have children, and it makes sense that the resources of this one planet are finite, and that if humanity were to continue to inhabit this place called Earth, we do have to start thinking about our consumption. In other words, what constitutes sustainable consumption? What is a regener

Dear Community, It is winter break here. Since my children were born, the way I interact with time is different: it’s all about their schedule, my guilt about not being a “good mother” (more on this topic in future newsletters), and child-centered activitie. We are staying home during this blessed winter break, so I have made up my mind that I will use this time to rest. I understand rest theoretically. I recommend it to all my patients (I am known to write prescriptions for

Dear Community,   I woke up this morning to the deafening sound of (what it felt like) a thousand leaf blowers. I live in a neighborhood of mostly old, white people. It is the neighborhood that resonated the most with me 11 years ago, when we moved here. I wanted to be close enough to work to be able to take the scooter or walk, because this is how we did it in the old country. We walked everywhere.   In the meantime, in the 11 years my family and I lived in this neighborhood

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